The 40th Day

Today is the 40^th day since my mother died. In the Eastern Orthodox Church, the 40^th day is the official end of the mourning period, referencing the Ascension occurring 40 days after Easter. For the 40 days following death, it is believed the person has not officially left this world completely, and may still visit their homes, their graves and their loved ones. After this day, the deceased has now officially moved on. Clothes can be given away to the poor and the house cleaned out.

  

The 40^th Day

No more visits

to the urn,

to the frozen grave, still undug,

to the closet

where the clothes still hang,

to the shoes and belt

still laid out

for the next day

that never came,

to the bed on which

she laid down

that morning

and from which

she never rose again.

Now is the time

to rise up,

to go onward

deeper into

the mysterious color

that deepens and shimmers

and goes on and on.

It is time to shut the door,

to turn out the light,

to turn away

and move on

from what was once

familiar

and is now awkward

and strange.

It is time

 to go

and leave behind

the urn

the closet

the bed

the shoes and belt

the one who

stands there

empty-handed

and bewildered

and staring

blankly

into the gathering dusk

and all

it holds.

—Jamie Parsley